February: Repairing Self-Esteem after Abuse

Week 1: Recognizing the possibility of repair
Week 2: Self-esteem is based on more than feelings           
Week 3: Self-esteem is not based on others’ assessments             
Week 4: For us, self-esteem is based in God

As survivors, we are strong, resourceful people. We’ve overcome various challenges and often had to do that without help. But many of us often undervalue ourselves.

This is not your fault. It is a direct result of your trauma, and of the abuse that you lived through. Your abuser damaged your sense of self-worth, especially if you didn’t have access to adults who believed and supported you.

Much of the advice out there (especially on the internet) isn’t always helpful for survivors of child sexual abuse. Toxic positivity – you can find a definition here – can make us feel that our struggles with self-esteem are a personal failing, but this is not true.

This week, if you wish, gently remind yourself of these three facts:

1. When I was abused, my self-esteem was damaged.
2. This was not my fault.
3. And it can be restored.